


and what did she do?  (She went off the fucking wall)

by The_Wilds_Musings (HarryJamesPeralta)



Category: The Wilds (TV 2020)
Genre: F/F, Fatin needs Leah as much as Leah needs Fatin, Fatin/Leah, Friendship/Love, Past Relationship(s), They still really don't talk about their feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 01:15:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29481306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HarryJamesPeralta/pseuds/The_Wilds_Musings
Summary: On the island Fatin held Leah together, after the island Leah didn't need her and Fatin fell apart.3 years later Leah shows up, nothing has changed between them, yet everything has changed between them.One-Shot
Relationships: Fatin Jadmani & Leah Rilke, Fatin Jadmani/Leah Rilke
Comments: 15
Kudos: 70





	and what did she do?  (She went off the fucking wall)

It’s been just over three years since they left the bunker and returned to regular life. Fatin and Dot had done exactly what they had promised each other. Gotten an apartment the minute they got back to the states. Dot didn’t even stop in Texas, she called some company to sell the house and ship her her belongings with the proceeds. Shelby had moved to Minnesota to be with Toni and Martha after graduation, Rachel and Nora were finishing university this year, but Fatin felt empty.

Alone, which is dumb because she lives with fucking Dot.

No one really knew what happened to Leah when she returned. When they landed in California she had handed Leah a slip of paper with her phone number on it, Leah had gone back to their hometown, she and Dot had disappeared to Los Angeles nearly four hours away. Leah’s socials hadn’t been updated a single time since her return, she kind of just fell off of the fucking planet. And Fatin would know. She checks. Maybe too obsessively. Every morning, first thing she does when she wakes up is checks Facebook, _Leah Rilke_ , no updates since two days before their trip to hell. Then she checks Instagram _LMRilke17_ a single post, a photo of the eight of them that was released before they even flew back to the states, captioned, “My Family.” And nothing since. She checks every social medial platform she can think of. Myspace, VSCO, Snapchat ( _Last active 2Y11M_ ), Twitter, TikTok, Tumblr, YouTube, she even checks rightwing bullshit Parler, nothing. There’s never anything. She sighs deeply and tosses her phone to the end of the bed and forcers herself to fall back asleep, not that she has anything going on anyway. 

Nearly five hours later she hears their apartment door slam and she sits up, she knows she looks like shit, she just is honestly beyond caring. “Time to get up Fatin,” Dot’s voice is far to fucking cheerful. It is only nine in the morning, yeah, so she searched for Leah every morning at four a.m. on the dot. Sue her. 

“Morning Dottie,” she managed after a large stretch, Dot had invaded her bedroom to wake her.

“Guess who texted our group chat?” Dot raised an eyebrow and Fatin panicked. She dove for her phone on the end of the bed and grabbed it, cursing herself for not charging it, it was only at four percent. She plugged it in before opening it and her heart stopped. There it was.

 **818-515-0891:** Miss me?

Attached with a picture of Leah, she looked good, better than good, she looked amazing. Behind her there were mountains covered in snow and she was absolutely glowing. She clicked on the phone number to send Leah a message separate from the group chat.

 **Fatin:** Rilke.

 **818-515-0891:** Miss me?

Fatin nearly snorted, of course she’d just repeat her same question, because of course Fatin was the only one that hadn’t responded to the group message.

 **Fatin:** Obviously, where the fuck have you been??

 **818-515-0891:** Can I call you?

Fatin ushers Dot out of her room in the biggest hurry she’s ever done and tries to make herself look presentable, not because Rilke hasn’t seen her worse, but because she truly looks like shit. She throw son a beanie to hide her bedhead and changes out of her rumpled clothing before she texts back quickly.

 **Fatin:** Obviously.

It feels like thirty seconds have passed and suddenly her phone is ringing. Flashing those ten digits at her and she knows it’s Leah, but for some stupid reason she’s actually nervous.

“Hey,” she answers her phone in the most casual way she can think of and she almost drops her phone when Leah has the audacity to laugh.

“Hey back,” Leah’s voice is soft, softer than Fatin ever remembers it being in school, or on the island.

“Where have you been?” she asks and she knows its needy, but they had agreed no one was going off the fucking wall when they landed and what did she do? She went off the fucking wall. Her voice catches in her throat and she knows she probably sounds as close to tears as she actually is.

“I’m so sorry Fatin,” and Fatin can tell she is, her voice sounds as choked up as Fatin is, but she doesn’t really say anything else and they sit there on the phone, Fatin listening for her breathing and relieved when it comes steadily. It’s Leah who breaks the silence, “I’m coming home,” she ads and Fatin wonders where she has been for real, and asks in the nicest tone possible where she’s been to which Leah only responds, “I may have bought a tiny house and lived in the mountains.”

“Alone?” Fatin knows her voice sounds somewhat raspy, but she did only just wake up, it definitely doesn’t have anything to do with how close she’s been to crying this entire conversation, she keeps pinching herself to see if she’ll wake up to Dot coming home from her morning shift at the coffee shop she owns, but she knows its real this time.

“Usually alone, I hung out with a bunch of tiny house people, we kind of traveled together for a few years, but, I’m ready to come home now.” Fatin nods before realizing that Leah can’t fucking hear her brains rattling around.

“Do you need a place to stay? Dottie and I have a spare room.” The offer of a spare room was always open for any of the unsinkable eight, or fucking all of them, they could all share a three bedroom apartment, it didn’t matter, they loved one another, they were family.

“That’d be nice, I’m selling the tiny house this week and flying to LA on Friday.”

“I’ll pick you up at the airport, forward me your details Lee,” the nickname slips from her lips so unintentionally, but she hears Leah’s breath hitch slightly.

“Fatin—”

“It was an accident, I’m sorry,” Fatin cuts her off trying to keep her composure. She squeezed her eyes closed tightly as Leah said softly.

“I have to go Fatin,” She nodded, but Leah had already hung up. For the first time in over three years she lets her mind drift back to the island.

_Somewhere between the days of fifty four and seventy two:_

_Leah’s is tucked safely into Fatin’s chest, neither of them sure how this had started, but neither willing to stop, the last seventeen das of this. The days were getting shorter, albeit not a lot, which probably meant it was fall now, but the weather hadn’t changed much, if at all, which Nora said meant they were probably close to the equator, which made perfect sense temperature, humidity, and berry-wise. But the nights were definitely getting cooler, they had all taken to a night time sleeping buddy, Fatin and Leah had fallen into their night time cuddles so effortlessly, Leah tucked against her as if she were six inches shorter rather than the three inches taller, Her arms wound around Fatin’s waist and Fatin’s arm thrown casually over Leah’s shoulder. They laid face to face every night, well, face to chest in Leah’s case, but it was so comfortable none of them complained. Obviously Toni and Shelby were shacking up, which left Dottie to cuddle with Martha and the Reid sisters to get over their shit and love each other. Realistically they all laid so close to one another they could make an entire cuddle train, but they always divided the same way. No one complained about the sleeping arrangements except Dot who poked fun at Shelby and Toni for always kissing too much before falling asleep, but really they all found it incredibly endearing how Shelby had come into her own on the island. Once the other six fall asleep Leah does as she has every single night, Fatin doesn’t stop her, she wouldn’t stop her even if Leah asked. She presses the gentlest kiss to Fatin’s lips and Fatin is lost in Leah’s shining eyes, her soft touches, they never do anything beyond kissing in fear of waking the others, but one night Fatin whispers._

_“I love you Lee,” and Fatin can see her face flushing deeply, Fatin opens her mouth to continue, but Leah cuts her off with a harsher kiss, pulling away to whisper back._

_“I love you too Fatin.” During the day everything is normal, they don’t hold hands, or kiss, or really talk, but when it’s time to sleep Leah always kisses her, they kiss until they fall asleep wrapped up in each others arms and whisper sweet nothings against the others cheeks._

When Fatin opens her eyes her pointer finger rubs over her bottom lip softly, as if she can still feel the light kiss of Leah against her plump lips. A knock on her door startles her, but Dot enters.

“You okay?” Dot asks and Fatin shakes her head no. She had confided in Dot, and only Dot, about what her and Leah’s relationship was, which was confusing, because they had never labeled it. They said they loved each other, they made out, a lot, they held each other, Fatin gave her nicknames, but the only one that stuck was Lee. Dot sits on Fatin’s bed and runs a hand through Fatin’s hair, this poor girl had been wrecked for over three years. She was fine the first week of Leah’s disappearance, but then she became obsessive. Checking socials all day, googling Leah’s name to make sure that she hadn’t died, and mostly avoiding other people. Dot was sure that the only reason that Fatin was alive was because she had in the beginning, forced her to eat, shower, and sleep until it became second nature to Fatin again.

“I really loved her Dottie,” Fatin whispers to Dot and Dot nods because no words she says will help. She does open her arms for Fatin and the thin girl basically crawls into her lap for comfort. Fatin made jokes, but unfortunately for all of them Dot was the only tragically heterosexual human on that island. There were Toni and Shelby, the lesbians living in Minneapolis. Leah and Fatin the bisexuals who were unfortunately separated. Dot, the gayest straight girl they ever met. Martha, a pansexual woman openly dating a trans man named, yes you guessed it, Marcus. Nora, openly asexual, and Rachel a certified ex-diving champion who fell in love in law school with the first diver she laid her eyes on, a woman named Annalise, who they all called Ann.

Dottie didn’t really respond, just held Fatin until she cried herself out, when she woke she seemed in a much better mood and Dottie didn’t question it other than saying, “Sure you’re good Jadmani?” to which Fatin nodded enthusiastically. She was currently scrubbing out their stove and had the entire refrigerator emptied, cleaning it out as well. She was jamming to some early 2000’s pop which honestly made Dot so bored, but she wasn’t about to complain. This was the most upbeat anyone had seen Fatin in three years.

\--- 

Leah had of course texted her the details within an hour of hanging up with Fatin and they had texted the entire week, basically nonstop. It almost felt like life for them was normal, but also merged with what had happened on the island. 

**818-515-0891:** How’s it going Prince Charming?

 **Fatin:** If you get to call me that I’m going to call you Lee.

 **818-515-0891:** I’m okay with it, I’ve missed you.

 **Fatin:** I’ve missed you too, I can’t believe you ghosted me for three fucking years Lee.

 **818-515-0891:** It really wasn’t my intention, I had only planned on going off grid for like, a month or two, but when I finally got cell service for the first time three weeks after I saw your snapchat story.

 **Fatin:** You mean the literal only time I’ve gone out drinking since we returned and wound up making out with six different girls because they mildly looked like you?

 **818-515-0891:** That was really the only time? Your story was full of just you, making out with girls, it was like fifty snaps long dude.

 **Fatin:** Swear it on my life, I’ve literally regretted nothing more than that night since we got home.

 **818-515-0891:** When you said you loved me, did you mean it?

Fatin presses the facetime button and Leah connects immediately. She’s at a hotel near the airport in Gilette, Wyoming.

“Did you?” her voice wavers slightly and Fatin nods, knowing that Leah can see her.

“I meant it every fucking time Lee.” Their topic of conversation moves quickly off of what happened on the island because, well, they don’t want to think about the time they were stuck on a fucking island for eight months, and how they spent five of those months wrapped in each other’s arms head over heels without ever establishing what the fuck they were doing. They definitely knew after the first two weeks every other girl on the island knew something was happening with them because Toni and Shelby were always making eyes at them and wiggling their eyebrows, and Dot was always telling them slyly before bed to get a fucking room, but they still didn’t label it or do anything about their feelings. Fatin felt every syllable of the words _useless lesbian_ other than the fact that she was bi, but with a strong preference for Leah over any other person. Leah stays on facetime until Fatin falls asleep, whispers, “I love you too.” And hangs up her phone.

When morning comes Fatin is showered, dressed, and fed before Dot gets home from the coffee shop which surprises both Dot and Fatin. They wait around for an hour or two before deciding it was time to brave that good ‘ol LA traffic to pick up Leah. When she finally makes eye contact with Leah in person her heart thuds in her chest uncomfortably and instead of hugging her, or better yet kissing her, she says. “You’re shorter than I remember Rilke,” and playfully pushes her, which is funny because Leah is at least four inches taller than Fatin. Typical Fatin, putting up walls the second Leah arrives. Fatin doesn’t know that all of the other girls have a betting pool on how long it’ll take before they’re officially dating, how long it takes them to get engaged, and how long it’ll take for Fatin to ditch out of their lease, which is fine, Dot can afford the place alone. They could have bought sixty houses with their settlement money, Dot just preferred the simple life. When they arrive back at the apartment Dot excuses herself to the coffee shop when she receives a text that an employee hasn’t shown up for the afternoon shift and Fatin breathes out nervously.

“I can give you the tour? Or show you to your room, or I ca—” Fatin’s caught completely off guard when Leah invades her personal bubble, but doesn’t move away, she swallows the lump in her throat and looks at Leah the way she’s wanted to these last three years. Their eyes meet and Fatin breaks eye contact, because it’s jut too intense, but her eyes travel down Leah’s face to her lips, then when she finds herself licking her own lips she meets Leah’s gaze again. Fuck, why was it so hard to look at Leah without making it weird. They stood mostly awkwardly for five minutes, just drinking in the other woman before Leah leaned in, their lips met tentatively, as tentatively as the very first kiss they had.

_Fatin’s head was resting on top of Leah’s in their current sleeping position, not that either of them was asleep, they were just trying out sleeping positions until one felt right, and so far, this one was the winner. Fatin’s eyes were closed, but she felt Leah moving, she wasn’t really sure what she was doing until their lips brushed, Fatin’s eyes opened in surprise, Leah’s eyes were shut, softly, comfortably. She did what anyone should do in that moment, she kissed Leah back. Their lips fit together perfectly, Leah’s jagged fingernails dug into her waist as their kiss intensified for several moments before she pulled away. And when she pulled away she pressed a chaste kiss to Fatin’s jaw, which didn’t feel all that chaste in the moment, she gasped, wanting more, but Leah had curled back into her without a single word._

Fatin kissed Leah back as if she’d never kissed another person, to be fair, she hadn’t kissed another person since that party almost three years ago, and before that Leah. She was out of practice, sloppy, Leah didn’t seem to mind. When Leah broke the kiss she pressed a less than innocent kiss to Fatins jaw and she gasped, just as she did the first time they kissed on the island, and instead of curling into Fatin’s chest Leah’s lips moved slightly lower pressing hot, open mouthed kisses against Fatin’s throat.

“Fuck Lee,” Fatin whispered, her voice was heavier than usual, full of need and Leah pulled away smiling.

“I won’t run away again.” She promised and Fatin nodded, this time Leah could feel Fatin nodding as their lips met again.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know where this came from, but its here.  
> One-Shot


End file.
